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Benny Joins The Mafia
Benny Cornetto was sick and tired of people walking all over him. He had tried everything. He had attended seminars on how to build confidence. He had taken private lessons to help him become more assertive. Nothing worked. Nobody took Benny seriously.
One day, Benny decided to join the Mafia. His friend Doug thought this was a bad idea.
“Come on Benny,” said Doug. “You wouldn’t say boo to a goose. How can you expect to join the world of organised crime?”
“I’ve tried everything Doug,” replied Benny. “I’m in the last chance saloon. When people realise I’m connected to the Mob, they won’t mess with me anymore.”
Benny arrived for his meeting with the head of the local Mafia, Antonio Pistone.
“Well, look who it is,” said Antonio as Benny walked into the bar. “Little Benny from South Street. I understand you want to join us?”
“Yes Godfather Antonio, yes! I want to be a part of your organisation more than anything in the world! I’m very diligent, and extremely discreet.”
“That’s music to my ears Benny,” said Antonio. “Tell me something, do you mind getting your hands dirty?”
“Of course not Godfather Antonio. Do you want me to kill someone?”
“Kill someone? Are you crazy? I need someone to clean the toilets here.”
“I can do that!” replied Benny excitedly.
And just like that, Benny became the head of toilet cleaning of the local Mafia. Nobody messed with him again.
Further examples:
I’m sick and tired of my boss, I wish he’d just relax for one second!
You’ve got to stop letting people walk all over you. You need to learn how to be more assertive.
You think Henry smashed your car windows? Are you serious? He wouldn’t say boo to a goose, he would never do something like that!
John’s in the last chance saloon. His wife will leave him if he doesn’t stop drinking.
Don’t mess with me, I swear you will regret it.
You need to be discreet if you work as a personal assistant. You hear all kinds of private and sensitive information in that job..
I’m so glad we have Rachel at this company. She’s so diligent and reliable.
Are you saying we don’t have to go to the office tomorrow? That’s music to my ears, I’m going to have an extra hour in bed!
When you reach the top of the political world, you have to accept that sooner or later, you might need to get your hands dirty…