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Mike’s Magic Mirror
One day, Mike McCallister took his dog into town to buy a new bedroom mirror. He noticed a new shop. Inside the shop window was a big sign saying ‘Magic Mirror - Only £5’.
Mike entered the shop.
“Excuse me,” said Mike. “I’m interested in buying your magic mirror.”
“Excellent choice sir,” said the man behind the counter. “Only £5, it’s an absolute steal! All you have to do is look in the mirror every morning, and make a wish.”
Mike assumed the man was probably a basket case, but even so, he was very curious about this magic mirror. When Mike got home, he fed the dog in the kitchen and then walked up the apples and pears to his bedroom so he could put his new mirror up on the wall.
The next morning, Mike jumped out of bed. He felt fresh as a daisy. It was time to use the magic mirror. Mike stood in front of the mirror and made a wish.
“I wish my dog could talk.”
After making his wish, Mike got dressed and went downstairs to the kitchen. He found the dog waiting for him.
“Morning Mike,” said the dog. “Any chance of some food?”
Mike was gobsmacked. The magic mirror really worked.
“Of course boy,” said Mike. “I’ll get you some food, and then we can talk about anything you want. How about football? Or maybe James Bond films?”
The dog looked disappointed.
“Actually Mike, my only real interest is in America’s federal income tax. Did you know that in 1913, the 16th Amendment established the federal income tax system used in America today?
At that moment, Mike realised his dog was as dull as dishwater.
Further examples:
I can’t believe you paid less than £100 for that jacket. It’s an absolute steal!
I’m not going on another date with him, he was a complete basket case! I need to block him on Instagram as well.
Wait a moment, I’ll just run up the apples and pears and grab my wallet, then we can go to the cinema.
I feel fresh a daisy, it must be that glass of warm milk I drank before bed!
Tim was gobsmacked when his grandmother started breakdancing at the wedding.
Please don’t invite the boss to our work drinks, he’s as dull as dishwater, it would be so painful!